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April 10, 2015

#1510: Napoleon


[[Two musketeers present a handcuffed Napoleon to a magistrate.]]

Soldiers: This is Napoleon. He tried to take over the world.

Magistrate: Exile him to Elba!

[[Three musketeers present a somewhat dirty, handcuffed and shackled Napoleon to a magistrate.]]

Soldiers: It’s us again. Napoleon escaped from Elba and tried to conquer the world. Again.

Magistrate: Send him someplace truly remote, like Saint Helena.

Soldiers: Yes, sir.

Several years later…

[[Six musketeers present a dripping wet, handcuffed and shackled Napoleon, with an octopus on his head, to a magistrate.]]

Soldiers: Well, he swam back.

Magistrate stands and gestures to the skies imperiously.

Magistrate: We must mount an expedition to the south pole, where we will encase Napoleon in the antarctic ice!

A century later…

[[THE PRESIDENT stands behind a podium. Behind him stands a very dirty, handcuffed, shackled, splinted napoleon with icicles dripping off his hat.]]

President: We choose to go to the moon, not because it is easy…