#882: Significant

[[Person with a pony tail runs up to another person, who subsequently points off-panel where there are presumably scientists.]]

Ponytail: Jelly beans cause acne!

Another: Scientists! Investigate!

Scientists: But we’re playing Minecraft!

Scientists: … Fine.

[[Two scientists. One has safety goggles, the other has a sheet of notes.]]

Goggles: We found no link between jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

[[Back to the original two.]]

Another: That settles that.

Ponytail: I hear it’s only a certain color that causes it.

Another: Scientists!

Scientists: But Miiiinecraft!

[[20 near identical small panels follow, 4 rows 5 columns.]]

Goggles: We found no link between purple jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between brown jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between pink jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between blue jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between teal jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between salmon jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between red jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between turquoise jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between magenta jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between yellow jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between grey jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between tan jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between cyan jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found a link between green jelly beans and acne (p < 0.05).

Off-panel: WHOA!

Goggles: We found no link between yellow jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between beige jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between lilac jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between black jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between peach jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

Goggles: We found no link between orange jelly beans and acne (p > 0.05).

[[Newspaper front page.]]

NEWS

Green Jelly Beans Linked To Acne!

95% Confidence

[[There is a picture of 3 green jelly beans.]]

Only 5% chance of coincidence!

Scientists…

{{Title text: ‘So, uh, we did the green study again and got no link. It was probably a–’ ‘RESEARCH CONFLICTED ON GREEN JELLY BEAN

ACNE LINK; MORE STUDY RECOMMENDED!’}}