February 16, 2011
#861: Wisdom Teeth
Guy, on phone: Hey! Know how you’ve been bugging me to play Minecraft for the past year? I’m game.
Girl, on phone: But you said you didn’t want to “get hooked and spend days on end moving virtual cubes around while sitting motionless.” What changed?
Guy, on phone: I’m having my wisdom teeth out, and I’ll be useless and doped up on painkillers for the next few days, so that actually sounds like the perfect distraction.
Girl, on phone: Oh. I’ll set you up on our server!
72 hours later…
[[Girl sitting at computer.]]
Girl, on phone: Hey – starting to feel better? Enjoying the game? Let’s see what you’ve… What the hell? Where IS everything?
[[View of a Minecraft screen showing a vast empty expanse of land.]]
Girl, offscreen: … You made the entire continent perfectly flat?
Guy, offscreen: And sorted it into layers.
Girl, offscreen: …
Guy, offscreen: I feel good about things. This is a good game.
[[Guy sitting on the floor at his laptop, bleeding from the mouth, surrounded by bloody wadded-up tissues and holding a bottle of medication.]]
Girl, on phone: … What exactly is in the painkillers they gave you?
Guy, woozy: I can’t read the label because I’m a hologram.