December 30, 2011
#997: Wait Wait
Headlines!
Stockpiled in case Peter Sagal, host of NPR’s Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, does something newsworthy in 2012.
((Series of above-the-fold newspapers follows; Each has a headline, picture in most of them, and an explanation))
Wait Wait Don’t Shoot Me
[[A fierce Peter Sagal in a balaclava brandishes a gun in a supermarket]]
NPR’s Sagal in Whole Foods hostage standoff.
Wait Wait Don’t Vote For Me
Peter Sagal quits race for GOP top spot
[[A sullen and defeated Peter Sagal surrounded by supporters admits defeat]]
Wait Wait Don’t Judge Me
Sagal opens up about his Kermit fantasy.
[[Stock profile images of Peter Sagal and Kermit the Frog]]
Wait Wait Don’t Fire Me
[[Stock profile image of Peter Sagal]]
Peter Sagal let go after racist tirade.
Wait Wait Don’t Cancel Me
NPR axing news quiz.
[[NPR spokesperson delivering announcement]]
Wait Wait Don’t Interrupt Me
Sagal stabs Carl Kasell in on-air dispute.
[[Peter Sagal mid-attack with a knife]]
Wait Wait Don’t Look At Me
[[Peter Sagal with a skin condition]]
Peter Sagal’s Poison Ivy Ordeal
Peter Sagal: “My ‘Nam”
Wait Wait Don’t Friend Me
Peter Sagal deletes his Facebook account.
[[Person holding up a laptop with an “Facebook account not found” screen]]
Wait Wait Don’t Seduce Me
How Lakshmi Singh stole Sagal’s Heart.
[[A wistful Lakshmi Singh being left by a sullen Peter Sagal]]
Wait Wait Don’t Leave Me
[[A wistful Peter Sagal being left by a furious Beth Sagal]]
Sagal’s wife out after affair
Wait Wait Don’t Spray Me
Police Raid Sagal’s Occupy NPR protest
[[Scummy policeman in riot gear spraying Peter Sagal in the face point blank with what is essentially a food product]]
Wait Wait Don’t Indict Me
Sagal, five others named in cash-for-tote-bags scandal
[[Peter Sagal doing a perp walk]]
Wait Wait Don’t Clone Me
Peter Sagal ‘Outraged’ over DNA harvesting.
[[Fiery Peter Sagal, missing a small amount of DNA, at a podium]]
Wait Wait Don’t Bust Me
Peter Sagal’s ghost captured
[[Ghostbusters, careful not to cross the streams, capture the ghost of Peter Sagal]]
Wait Wait Don’t Dissect Me
Snoozing Sagal nearly snuffed in autopsy snafu
[[Peter Sagal running away from from a very surprised pathologist]]
Peter Sagal: “I ain’t dead!”
Wait Wait Don’t Objectify Me
Peter Sagal is more than just a piece of meat
Wait Wait Don’t Beatify Me
[[Peter Sagal shakes his fist at a picture of the pope]]
Peter Sagal Rebukes Pope
Wait Wait Don’t Me
Peter Sagal Accidentally
[[Peter Sagal in a blank vacant]]
Wait Wait Don’t Speak Its Name
[[eyes… Eyes… AAAHHH]]
Peter Sagal wakes Eldritch terror
Peter Sagal:“AAAAAAAA”
Wait Wait Even For NPR This Is A Bit Much
This American Life to document the road to recovery for those who suffer the trauma of losing on Wait Wait